Category: Remembrance

Supporting A Bereaved Parent During The Holiday Season

11/16/2022

Know someone who's experienced the loss of their baby? Show up and do something to support them this holiday season. Read below for tips and please share any with us in the comments:

- HONOR THEIR BABY: It can be as simple as lighting a candle and sending a picture to them or you could make a donation to a charity in memory of their baby.

- MEET-UP FOR COFFEE: "I'd love to meet up with you for coffee this week. Should we meet at your house or go to a local shop?" Or offer to go for a walk if coffee isn't their thing. Keep in mind they may decline your offer, but by sending invitations they know you are thinking of them. When meeting up, let them guide the conversation and just LISTEN.

- SEND CARD OR GIFT: A "thinking of you" card can be so meaningful. Include baby's name and let them know you're keeping all of them close to your heart this season.

- DROP OFF TREATS: Whether it's a brunch basket, a cookie platter, or general groceries, food is always appreciated. Especially this time of year when grieving people typically want to avoid shopping in stores. Let them know you're dropping off something to their door steps and don't expect an invitation in.

- CHECK-IN TEXT: "Been thinking of you and baby - hoping you have some moments of peace this week". "Sending love to you and your family as you remember baby".

- HELP WITH CHORES: Don't ask if they need help - just offer and make the plan so they don't have to. "I'm planning to come over Sunday morning to shovel your walkway. Are you running low on salt?"

What have you done to support your loved ones who are grieving? Share with us in the comments.

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Coping With Holiday Grief After Pregnancy & Infant Loss

11/9/2022

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The holiday season can be tough as it is, then add the weight of grief to that and it can be a very isolating, overwhelming, and emotional end to the year. We know that many bereaved families are struggling. Read below for some ideas on how to cope, and please don't hesitate to reach out to us for additional support.

Simplify, Simplify, Simplify. It's okay to decline invitations and not go to every single party (or any). By communicating with your family and friends, you will relieve yourself from past expectations. What are some ways you can simplify the "stress" of the holiday season?
Acknowledge The Loss of Your Baby. Gift giving can be especially hard during family functions. All the kids are opening their gifts and your child is not there to open their gifts. Or maybe you were supposed to still be pregnant for this season. What can you do to honor your child during this time?
Make A Plan, Then Make A Back-Up Plan. Are you able to attend the event with a trusted friend? Is there a "safe space" (guest bedroom, outdoor space, your car) you can go to if the emotions become overwhelming? It's okay to the let the host know you can only stay for a certain amount of time. Can you bring a "comfort kit" with you including some things like worry stones, stress ball, essential oils, beaded bracelet to fidget with, etc.? If you feel a grief burst coming on, what will you do to cope?
"There Is No Reward For Speed" - Dr. Alan Wolfelt. Take it slow. Think about your baby during these times. Talk to others about your baby and allow them to see that it's "okay" to mention your child's name. Do you feel rushed in your grief during the holiday season? What can you do to slow down? What can you ask from others to help you during this time?
Take Advantage Of Online Shopping. Most stores have adapted to offering delivery or drive-up pick-up. Stores will be filled of triggers - it's okay to do all of your shopping online. If you do have to shop in-person, bring headphones with you and listen to a motivating playlist or podcast. How do you plan to shop this holiday season? Or will you decide not to gift give this year?
Give Yourself Grace. It's normal to feel ALL the emotions - anger, jealousy, joy, sadness, peace. Embrace them, know these feelings will pass, and know that you are not alone in feeling this way. How can you communicate your feelings with your close supporters?

#waystocope #pregnancyandinfantloss #healingafterloss #holidaygrief

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Thankful Remembrance Tree

12/14/2021

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For the month of November, we displayed a beautiful "Thankful Tree" in our Center for Child Loss. Sweet little leaves were decorated with the names of the babies we are missing each and every day. After experiencing a pregnancy or infant loss, we know that the holidays can be overwhelming, daunting, and even more of an emotional roller coaster. We hope this tree reminds you that there is room in heart for both grief and gratitude and that your baby is with you as you continue to travel this grief journey.

Pictures and videos were shared on our Facebook and Instagram during November. Thank you to everyone who shared their babies' names with us and for the loving messages appreciating the tree.